Each one of us have treasured friends, those we met when were still young and managed to grow up together. Those we met in schools and work place, some turn from friendship to acquintance. I may say I met a lot of so-called and real friends so far.
Why am I talking about friends? Well, Just to be honest I feel really lonely right now. I’ve learned that those friends I recently hanging out with hide something behind my back.
I trusted them enough to opened up my feelings, to opened up my past although it still hard for me to talk about it. It’s not that I wanted them to do the same, but there is this incident where someone did something inappropriate to one of them. Okay! I dont want to say what it is specifically, but since all those involved is part of our circle every one is making a fuss about it.
We discussed about it, trying to analyze what happened and to find the best solution that we can. They told me the story since I wasn’t around when that happens, but then i learned that they omited some part of thd story, they left out small but important detailed.
Iam the eldest among us all and they want to asked my opinion about. I try to defend the other and try to reason out things, not because Im in favor of that one. I just thought I know them all enough to say that they cant do it.
But as the discussion goes through the most honest one filled me in the missing details. To say I was hurt is an understatement to what I did feel.
I feel so small all of a sudden. I feel ashamed. Am I not trust worthy? Why do they have to lie? Why do they have to hide something?
I stood up and walked out. If they dont trust me enough, why did they bother to include me? Are they really my friends? Am I just overreacting?
I wish I know the answers to these question but as of now All I feel is hurt. Iam hurt because of them.